Monsters live out there....

This is Doe Valley Lake, Jo's boss lives and grew up here. He spent his entire childhood basically living at summer camp. I spent a great deal of mine going to the beach and getting beaten up by mexicans.

Not really.

Today was fun, we went on a boat ride, I took a bunch of pictures that I will probably post later, I got to watch the tuna sandwiches go rancid, and I crashed pontoon into the beach. Good times.

Tomorrow is going to suck. My car is in the shop so I have to steal Jo's, which means I have to wake up super early so I can drop her off at the studio (20 miles) then drive to work (25 miles) then drive to the hotel that we're conducting orientation in and back (maybe 4 miles total) then back to the studio after work (25 miles) then back home (another 20 miles.) That's almost 90 miles out of my way that I have to drive tomorrow just because I need a new muffler. Boo!

Actually, there are multiple days each week that Jo has to drive that far for her job, so I can't really complain too much. Plus my car is a '98 with almost 200k miles on it and it's never really needed major work, so again I am fortunate.

Where the hell is Benito!?!?!

When we were kids, we used to pay $5 to go see the Padres.

Yesterday UPS basically paid me $120 & bought me a bunch of free food to go to a Louisville Bats game. Did I mention that I love my job? Because I do.

We went to orientation today for our puppy manners class. Judging by the description of what the trainer lady (no Whitney, it isn't Ursa) we're dealing with much less than what the typical puppy owner is dealing with. I knew that Dot was smart.

Speaking of orientation, my dear dear dear dear dear dear dear dear friend Dustin will be coming to UPS orientation on Monday. He'll get to see me in a professional capacity and be all like "Damn! James is far more awesome that I previously knew!"

I'm sleepy and going to bed now. Sorry my day wasn't more eventful.

EAT AN ORANGE!!

Whole wheat Matzo Balls? Oh no.... THE HIPPIES HAVE GOTTEN TO THE JEWS!!! Curse you dirt-twirling stink piles!! Is nothing sacred to you!?!?

I kid, I kid.

Our dear friends Allison and Josh graced us with their company today. They made the long trip from Cincinnati just to pet our dog, which confused me because surely there are other dogs in Cincy. Actually, they have a dog. That's part of the reson they came, to compare. Things did get a little touchy when I held Josh down by the head yelling 'SAY IT!! SAY OUR DOG IS BETTER!!!" but luckily no blood was shed. We went to Cafe Mimosa and I had some dish that involves tofu, black beans, and a ton of vegetables. I love this meal, but I keep forgetting that Mimosa's chopsticks suck. They're made of a very glossy plastic and you can't really pick anything up. I looked a fool.

Some of the things in that last paragraph didn't happen.

Just so you guys know, the last time I posted for 4 days in a row was December 14-17 of last year. You're welcome. I do feel a little bad that I keep taking pictures and saying (at least to myself) "This will be a good picure-of-the-day!" when in reality I haven't had a picture of the day in over a year. At least not regularly.

Sometimes Jo goes to work and leaves me alone with the dog.

I was trying to do "Blue Steel" but sometimes my camera doesn't take the picture when I think it's going to. I would have tried it again, but as you can see Dot is leaving my lap.

So this is what you get, me taking a picture a 13 year old girl on myspace would take.

The band is almost back together (looking at you Ms. Reeves.) My dear friend Dustin moved to Louisville. This is a good thing. He also grossly over dressed for his job interview. Normally people come to us in tank tops and flip flops & covered in "F the police" tattoos. He wore a shirt & tie with "Hug the police" tattoos.

No, YOU SUCK!!

The weather man on TV says "Severe storm's a'comin!!"

I hope he's right, because if he's wrong then those aliens from ID4 are about to kick the crap out of the Greater Louisville Metropolitan Area.

He was right! As I type this it started pouring.

I'm going to watch the next (and possibly next 2) game of the NBA finals. I don't care about basketball at all, but I feel an obligation to watch championship games. Maybe it's the desire to see grown men cry, but I can use a bat and get the same outcome.

I'm neglectful.

I bought a floppy orange hat today.

I look ridiculous, but I don't care. It keeps the evil, evil sun away from the top of my head and my precious earlobes. I looked for the cheapest hat at Dicks that would encase my whole head in shadow & had those little vents on them so my head wouldn't get too hot. The least expensive version that I found happened to be orange. My frugality and severe lack of fashion sense have led me down a path that may have many people making fun of me.

In other McDonaldLand news, the cat still hates the dog. She's actually coming all the way downstairs and walking around the kitchen while Dot is in there, but she still hisses and swats at her whenever she sees her. She also has stopped peeing all over the place, which is a big plus. I love that cat to death and really want her to start coming back into the living room to watch TV with us. At least we have her when we go to bed.

On the job front, I have new duties that are still a bit of a mystery to me. They took the Orientation class duties away from me (which SUCKS) but I get to be involved in a lot of interesting nation-wide type projects.

Speaking of the projects, HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMILY! I'm glad Jo didn't "Drop that bitch" like she said she was going to do a few years ago when I accidentally caressed your butt.

must kill the dog....

The cat hates the dog.

Dot seems to be coming along nicely as part of McDonaldland. We've trained her to ring a bell that hangs from the back door when she wants to go outside (now we just have to get her to understand that the bell is for going to the bathroom, not just anytime she wants to go out) and she knows the basics like "down" and "sit."

Our dear Captain Tennille still hasn't come around on her though. I think that she's getting better, I took this picture because this is the closest that they've gotten to each other without a ton of hissing and swatting from the cat. I'll keep you updated because I know that you all care.

Small black speck = Dot.

This is Dot.

Today we took Dot for a walk & it was easily the shortest amount of time she spent trying to choke herself by rushing ahead/lagging behind us. Good dog.

I feel bad because we bought a "static perimeter collar" for her to teach her that going upstairs is off limits. I know it doesn't really hurt her, but I have seen it in action and it does bug the shit out of her when she tries to go up.

In case you're wondering, upstairs is off limits because that is the "Cat Sanctuary" where Fatty and Hippo can stay at a comfortable distance from Dotty until they get more used to her and feel they can come down and re-join the downstairs world. Tennielle is actually venturing almost 1/2 way down the stairs now to check the dog out.

Slobberin Time!

I call this one "the view from my treadmill."

I think we can all give up the idea that I'm ever going to start posting pictures everyday again, but loads of stuff has been going on recently and I felt the need to share.

First, we got a dog. If you're friends with my wife then you've seen pictures of her. She's a half Newfoundland and half Golden Retriever (we think.) She's a small black speck so we named her Dot. I was nervous about getting her, but it turns out she's among the best tempered puppies I've ever seen. She doesn't bark for no reason, she is about 90% housebroken, and she's already crate trained. That last one is a biggie. The problem with Chickenhead was that he barked all damn night and wouldn't let us sleep. Dot seems to enjoy her crate quite a bit & sleeps quitely through the night in it.

Second, our favorite moochers came over and stayed with us for a few days. Matt and Dani Lott returned to our fair country and stayed in our guest room for a few days. We laughed, we cried, we all grabbed our balls and spat.... except Dani.

Third, I kinda sorta got a new job. I'm still working for UPS and I'm still in the HR department and I'm not getting a raise, but I will be reporting to someone else and doing other stuff eventually. As long as I get to keep doing orientation (at least the classroom portion) I'll be happy.... however if I never see another "request page" as long as I live I will die a happy man.

Sometimes I feel compelled to post something but have no content.

This is my breakfast smoothie. I make this every morning. It's delicious and full of the nutrients a growing boy needs.

I was going to take a picture of the blender, but I couldn't find the camera in time.

We sold the bed upstairs and bought an awesome sofa bed. It's a transformer, not unlike Optimus Prime. Someday it too will save the earth..... and provide our friends with comfortable sleeping quarters.